To forgive yourself is to love yourself.
I used to forgive people who hurt me, mostly because it was practical. I could see i was usually more upset about what happened than the other person—and if I decided to let go of all the drama and move on, I could meet better people or choose better ways to respond next time.
Often the person wasn’t even aware because they had a different moral code or had their own demons to face. The way people act often has to do with their own internal dialogue than with anyone else. It’s hard work forgiving (but someone’s got to do it)—and the hardest person to forgive is always yourself.
You can deceive yourself into thinking there is nothing you hold against yourself. You can refuse to forgive yourself because you’re so much inside your head that you’ve lost perspective. All it takes is the realisation that you are not your actions.
Your actions are a part of who you are, but you are capable of more than the things you have done before. You can help heal a situation or choose better. Love yourself at your worst in the way you love the person dearest to you—and it will deepen the way you love.
—Saumya Ancheri
